Mothering Through Mid-Life (Embracing Life's Curves)

by Michelle Howe


I had just gotten out of bed and, admittedly, wasn't quite fully awake when my husband informed me that our eighteen-year-old daughter's car had been vandalized during the night. I stood there in the chilly kitchen taking in the specific details of the minor crime. The worst damage was the insulting graffiti written on her windows. A myriad of conflicting thoughts and emotions ran like a freight train through my brain—some of which, I am ashamed to confess, were of the reprisal sort.

As a mother of three young-adult daughters and a teenage son, I take my parenting role to heart. The better portion of the last twenty plus years has been spent investing in the physical, emotional and spiritual well-being of my offspring. So standing in my kitchen on that blustery winter morning, I was, in part, upset with the situation and, in part, frustrated with my own reaction. The temptation to disengage was overwhelming.

In talking with other mid-life moms whose own sons and daughters are at that "jumping off" stage, I have found a common thread. It's called premature disengagement.

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